That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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