mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
