Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize