you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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