just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
