can we get nightvision for the apartment?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
