is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
if only i could text you this smell
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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