think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
