So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
