So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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