Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
