After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize
