wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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