i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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