Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
