Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
