so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Randomize
