If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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