Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
