Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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