Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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