I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
