Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
