I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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