oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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