Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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