she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
We left the knife in your bed.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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