found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I have aggressive nipples.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
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