Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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