spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
