just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
