We should be called the Road Head Warriors
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
So many bounce houses so little time
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
