i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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