Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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