i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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