My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
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