yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
