I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Randomize
