just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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