were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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