you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize