just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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