i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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