One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
