The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize