help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
