Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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