anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
