Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
"it" just moved
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
