She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
soo... how was my night?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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