You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
