Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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